Thursday, February 26, 2009

Empty Arms, full heart

Last night Ava and I went to mass for Ash Wednesday. She loves when I pick her up during church so she can see what's happening in the front. She is getting so big, it's hard to pick her up now. When she stands on the kneeler in church she is almost as tall as me! Anyway, I held her for a couple of minutes (it was probably really way shorter, it just felt like that long because she is soooo tall and heavy.) I almost started crying right in church when I put her down, I realized that I will probably never, ever hold either one of my kids again. 11 1/2 years ago we had Brock and when he got too big to hold we had Ava, now Ava (our baby) is too big. Sometimes when I am at church (the people behind me probably think I'm NUTS) I will sway like I have one of them in my arms like I did when Brock and Ava were little, when I realize what I am doing I stop but I find myself doing that almost every time we are at Church.
Don't get me wrong, I am so happy that they are both growing up, it's fun to watch them work on homework, play with their friends and become more and more independent every day but I am going to miss holding a child in my arms.


Cristina said...

Aw, that was very sweet :)

Beth said...

sounds like someone needs to have another.... heeeheee :)
I totally understand the swaying thing - I find myself doing that all the time.

marty39 said...

Oh I do so know what you mean. I love it that mine very grown with children of their own give me very big long hugs. It's like holding them in my arms again. Hugs, Marty

Tanya said...

Oh, that makes me tear up just thinking about it. Our oldest is only 4 1/2 (but 45 pounds!) and I know the days of holding her are drawing to a close. But you better believe I will hold her in my lap sitting down just as long as she will let me!

Buzzings of a Queen Bee! said...

What a precious moment, and it made me sad to read as well. It goes so fast, and I wish there was a pause and rewind button, don't you?

Hope things are good with you! Have a great weekend! :)